The F word.

Hi everyone! 

This blog post is gonna be about.... Fitness 

So for those of you who are not that interested in fitness and care more about how my week has been in TP ;) ;) you can go ahead and skip this post cus i'm not really gonna be talking about how my life/week has been. yet. I'll be blogging about that on friday or saturday :-) 

ok so here I go!

So, today I suddenly felt a need to blog about fitness here (and not on advofnatandanna) because recently I've been screwing with my diet and body so bad to the point that nat thought that I was having an ED.

Here's what happened. 

As you guys know, I injured my calf a month/few weeks back and I couldn't sprint or run. So I decided to take a break from working out because I simply couldn't take the pain.... Then when the pain went away, FO started so I didn't have time to work out anymore. And before I injured my calf, I have been working out 6 days a week and eating only greens and whole grain bread as staple carbs. So when I stopped working out, I felt helpless and sad and extremely worried that my 1 month of hardwork and working out has gone down the drain. What did I do to "resolve" this problem? I starved myself. 

First it was just no carbs, no fried food. -which was hard because I was out a lot and carbs was a staple in many many many food outlets so yeah-

Then, because it was so hard to find food that actually met my "requirements" right, I dropped to 2 meals a day. Just breakfast (which i normally eat at home) and lunch.

Then, I thought, hey if I can settle with just 1/2 of my portion that I normally eat for those 2 meals, it'd be great and my body would be probably be the same and maybe I might even manage to lose some weight.

So my portions became smaller and my meals became less frequent.

And eventually, I only ate breakfast to last me through the day.

Until 2 nights ago. What happened? I broke down. No idea why. I was at heous dinner... and as usual I didn't eat anything. And saw someone that pissed the living daylight out of me so when Ariel walked me to the bus stop, I started crying.... and then when I got home, I just continued crying and saying how much I hate life etc. I tried to talk to nat about it but I didn't know how to put my emotions into words because I had no idea what I was feeling. All I felt was sad, angry, confused and helpless. 

Nat said.. "you're eating too little and your "diet" is starting to screw your emotions and head up." 

So she told me to start eating at least 2 proper meals a day. I tried the next day (which was yesterday) and I actually felt much better (honestly, all I had was subway and mee hoon kueh) I even slept better.

Today I tried to eat as much as I could and I feel so proud of myself for eating 2 proper meals (yay)

But Nat and I were texting today and she was asking me about the last time I worked out and when was the next time I'm going for training.... I honestly, can't remember the last time I worked out or even went for a run and I have no clue when the next time I'm going training is gonna be. So she said....

"I think you need to prioritize soon." 

Which got me to thinking.... 

WHAT AM I DOING TO MY HEALTH. 

So yes, right now I'm trying to get back on my own 2 feet and back on the treadmill and training as frequently as I can.

And also, I'm gonna try and eat as healthily as possible. Back to how it used to be and how it SHOULD be.

So,

1. DIET.

I'm going back to eating 5 small meals a day, (slowly of course. not now) 

I'm still not eating white carbs/carbs. If I do, I'm only eating 1/4 or 1/2 of it.

I don't eat fast food so.. yeah.

No fried food.

My larger meals should consist of 70% greens, 20% protein and 10% carbs 

2. workout.

This was how my workout plan USED to be:

Monday, training 

Tuesday, Arms/weights

Wednesday, core

Thursday, training

Friday, legs/butt

Saturday, training

Sunday, rest OR cardio.

but now that I have school which makes it really hard for me to work out and makes me tired all the time 

so I'm gonna try this.

Monday - core

Wednesday - cardio/run

thursday - arms/weights

Saturday - training

It's gonna be tough but I'm going to try.

For those who are constantly feeling uninspired to workout/ run ( BUT ARE ALWAYS COMPLAINING ABOUT YOUR BODY -.- ) what I think is that, you need someone who is willing to work out with you and remind you of your goals and what not. 

For me, all of you guys know... it's nat. :-) I really love her more than words can say because we've been on this fitness journey for 6 months now and it has been really fulfilling. I'm not sure how I can actually explain the feeling of feeling good about yourself feels. But it feels better than starving yourself and "skinny feels"

Oh and 1 more thing, I don't base my progress on a weighing scale. I don't believe everything the scale tells me. muscle DOES NOT weigh more than fats. It just looks better on your body than fats does and it's more dense than fats. 

eg, 

it weighs the same but it LOOKS different on your body.

So yeah, I hope you guys will join me on this fitness journey and I hope people who are suffering with ED recover soon and find joy in working out and eating (a bit) more :-) 

Till next time, Anna <3